Is it crazy that I miss him? It has been a year since he said all of those things, ripping me completley apart. But yet I want him. I don't maybe I'm lonely. I want to make lists of why or why not but I know that doing so would be giving in. God wants me to do something, that my boundaries and limitations are making it increasingly difficult to do. I'm not good at people, school, or life. I find myself fantasizing about being 70 and finally being able to rest. Their isn't one young man I know right now I would want to marry. They are all just not quite right. I make myself furious because, their isn't anythign wrong with them. And I've hurt very good friends because of the feelings developed.
Anyways, maybe its just a problem because now I finally have something worthwhile to say? But it was always worthwhile, just now its more organized....
We're trying to get a diagnosis its just that adult ASD's are harder.... it should've been diagnosed earlier... but....
not that anyone of you in cyberland wanted to hear any of that..
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